Angry about being Angry?

I recently went on holiday and saw many people with ‘travel rage’! An airport is a perfect example of a place where people become stressed and angry. Many people are taken out of their comfort zone and are stressed before they even enter the building. People watching is great, you just know that the adrenaline and cortisol levels are going to be as high as the planes the passengers will be travelling on. The whole process of dragging luggage and kids, finding passports and run away toddlers, getting through customs (why do we feel guilty going through passport control and customs even though we have nothing to declare? I must look like I’m smuggling a case full of class A drugs!) and then finding the correct gate number can be enough to tip some people over the edge. Families argue, kids scream and then the poor ground staff are the target for all that pent up emotion!

As soon as the airport staff take the barrier away when the flight number comes up on the board you can see a plane load of people fighting to get to the front of the queue even though the gate doesn’t open for another 25 minutes and they have their seat allocated!. Chill out people, you’re going on holiday!

Super markets are another trigger for anger. I’ve been rammed with a trolley, cut up at the checkout, witness to domestic arguments and there’s nothing more guaranteed to get set people off than having to queue to pay!

Don’t even get me started on road rage… someone very close to me turns into an unrecognisable venom spitting monster when she is behind the wheel. Come to think of it, she’s the same when she’s a passenger!

Some people are just naturally angry and go through the whole day on red alert, waiting for some thing or some unfortunate person to cross their path.

Upon getting back to work after relaxing in a comatose state for 10 days I forgot how stressed out people can be even in a place of leisure

I recently witnessed Mr Angry of Stevenage. One of the staff got both barrels the other evening because a customer wasn’t happy with a situation which happens within all organisations from time to time. I was observing his body language - everyone is a case study to me, from gait, bio mechanics, body type, health, they all intrigue me! He was standing very close to the staff member, showing intimidation, he was shouting, his fists were clenched and he was red faced. This is what I saw from the outside but if he was aware of what was going on in the inside he may have got even more stressed!

Getting angry now and again is a natural reaction and won’t cause harm to your body once the rant has passed, all the physiological responses return to normal. But, if the red mist comes down regularly then this is when you’re increasing the risk of developing health problems.

• When we get angry our bodies release cortisol and adrenaline. These hormones are similar to those which are produced during stress and danger, very handy if you’re looking at the jaws of a lion but not as important on a day to day level! These circulating hormones put a lot of stress and strain on the heart and the cardiovascular system.
• Our blood pressure shoots up which can lead to a stroke over time
• Blood glucose levels rise to provide energy to our muscles, this is linked to our fight or flight instinct
• Fat globules circulate our blood vessels which can cause damage to the artery walls which can increase the risk of developing heart disease
• Stress can be the cause of stomach problems, such as irritable bowel syndrome, ulcers, bowel problems and intestinal cramping
• The brain becomes like a pressure cooker which leads to headaches or migraines and neck pain
• Constant adrenaline release can cause blood clots which could result in a stroke

He’s not doing himself any favours…

It’s hard to reason with people when they are in this mind set and staying calm is about your best bet. Any reaction from you and its voommm! They’re off again! Our Duty Manager was doing all the right things but I could see by observing him that he was under stress too which means that his own health is at risk because of the stress that was being inflicted on him.

I expect that many of you reading this blog will at some time or other been on the other end of some ones fury, it’s a fact, people are getting angrier!

• One in three are worried about a close friend or relative who can’t control their anger
• One in four are worried about their own anger
• One in five relationships end because of irrational anger

Some people see anger as the only way of getting their message across, they may feel that they can’t express their needs or concerns so shouting will seem like a good idea. No one likes to be shouted at, no one responds well to having a finger poked in the face and no one will give you what you want after being sworn at.

Think before you let rip!

• By getting angry you won’t achieve anything
• Walk away from the situation and try to calm down for at least 15 minutes
• Before you react, think. Is this situation going to be as important in five minutes? Five Hours? Is it really worth getting yourself worked up and upsetting people around you?
• Try to assess the situation before you get angry; the lady who regularly get angry at staff because she gets splashed when she goes swimming really needs to accept that this is a hazard of being in water!
• How many times have you ‘lost it’ and then regretted what you said due to a knee-jerk reaction? Never sent an email or text in the heat of the moment!! Get up, walk away and calm down before entering your angry words!
• Don’t shout! If I have to deal with a complaint and someone is coming at me hurling abuse and shouting I am not interested! Remember, the first six seconds count when you initially meet someone. However, if I deal with a complaint from someone who is calm and controlled and is putting their concerns and feeling articulately I will happily speak to them and try to resolve the problem. You are more likely to get results if you have the person dealing with the complaint on your side.

Learn relaxation techniques

Before you combust with anger learning how to relax can make a big difference to how you deal with situations.

• Taking a deep breath really helps! Inhale and exhale deeply three to four times, count to four slowly as you breathe in, count to eight slowly as you breathe out, concentrate on the air moving in and out of your lungs.
• Hatha yoga and Tai Chi are great sessions to attend if you suffer from stress or are having more anger episodes.

Take up regular exercise

• Regular physical activity teaches our bodies to regulate adrenaline and cortisol effectively. Fit people have higher levels of endorphins which are the ‘feel good’ hormones meaning that you are less likely to get angry in the first place
• It has well known that physical activity can help to prevent or improve depression. If people are depressed that can also feel irritable and anger, so if exercise is good for depression it follows that it can also improve anger.

Some people keep their feelings hidden and can’t show anger, they would rather walk away from a situation and avoid confrontation. Their health can still suffer, they need to release the pent up feelings before it has a detrimental effect on their body. I know someone who sails through life and seemingly has no stress or anger issues but, he has some wild nightmares! Other people will suffer headaches or a suppressed immune system which means that they catch every bug going. Talking helps as an outlet, as doe’s physical activity. We are all individuals and react differently to pressures.

It is also sometimes hard to recognise that you have a problem; other people could suggest that you have anger problems but they’re too scared to tell you in case you get angry!!

Counselling may be needed to help you cope better, there could be some deep rooted problems which is causing your anger, if you are worried have a chat with your GP.

So, the next time you feel that you are on a short fuse, think of the poor person who is on the receiving end, be nice, it could be me!

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